Beach etiquette

Apart from the sun sand and sea I think the best thing about being on a European beach is the people watching. I say European because while I’m sure some of the dynamics are universal i’m pretty sure some are purely European. For instance you can spot a North American on a European beach by the shock and awe at the topless sunbathers, yeah yeah that’s a horrific generalisation, and also 95% true so shush it 🙂 they can’t seem to help it, eyes drawn like moths to a flame, silly sausages, like they’ve never seen boobs before. Although to be honest on most beaches there are some boobs you’ll wish you’d never seen, even so the 70 year old granny who gets hers out always impresses me 🙂 you go for it Granny!

And what’s with the sitting right next to someone else?!? The Germans, Spanish and even Brits will avoid miles of pristine empty sand and plop themselves down within arms reach of anyone else already situated. There must be 300m of empty beach behind us but more and more people crowd into the 10m strip in front of us, leaving no more than a few feet between them. What the hell is that all about! Peeps is cray for realsies.

The thing I love most about the beach though is that we are all here, fatties, thinnies, shorties, giants, old and young, in next to nothing and every one of them is glorious. Nothing hidden, wrinkles, cellulite, muscles, hair for all to see, I fricking love it. I feel more comfortable here, in a bikini, heat beating down on me, my food baby belly proudly on display, make up free and hair curling madly than I do dressed to the nines, this, this is bliss Xx